so i dont know if this is going to be something you guys can relate to...but here it goes.  ( sorry i havent been posting i only do it when im really pissed or depressed.)

so my last boyfriend, i would call him dickface to protect his identity but since i dont care if he lads on a kinfe in the balls...ethan broke up with me, and i say "broke up " lossely. acording to ethan we never even dated, nope. he just led me on and then decided he didn't want to talk to me anymore, i never though i was compulisve but this whole not having closure is thing is really fucking me up. and now their is this guy that i really like but im going to have to make the first move, and i just cant bring my self to kiss him, am i not ready? or am i just a chiken. 

for some reason people seem to think having your virginity in high school is a myth, thoes girls don't exist. well it's not i have mine i dont know for how long thou, see ther is this guy i like him, i like him in that always trust him and know he wont hurt you and want to do everything you can to keep them from feeling pain kinda like, and i know he feels that same way about me, but im nervous, there is this other guy and i know he can't ever have my v card but i feel like its a race to which one of them gets it first even thou i know which one i have made up my mind, in my mind. i body just dosnt know this yet. so i ask, to be a virgin or not to be?